Video Of The Week: Guns N' Roses

Epic storytelling worthy of a Michael Jackson video? Check.
Beautiful images of nature, including an ocean-born guitar solo? Check.
Coolest guitar player of the 1980s and 1990s (Slash)? Check.
Live footage of the greatest live band of their era (provided they made it to the show)? Check.
Charles Manson t-shirt? Check.
Supermodels? Check.
A storyline that continues that of the two previous epics (Don't Cry and November Rain)? Check.
Dictionary definitions of key words? Check.

Yes, Del James' rendering of Axl Rose's vision is both one of the best and the most bloated piece of cinematic musicianship of its time, but to everyone involved's credit, it makes for a fine short film, and revolves around a pretty good song, a chorus pattern with evolving lyrics, multiple verses and solos, all well-crated and polished tom the extreme. Plus, it's almost 10 minutes long.

Duff McKagan, Matt Sorum, Dizzy Reed, and Gilby Clarke all find a place in the storyline, too, which is cool.

Estranged features some of the best GN'R lyrics, such as these (despite the flurry and rhyming of the word 'baby' in the bridge):

Old at heart, but I'm only 28
And I'm much too young to let love break my heart
Young at heart, but it's getting much too late
To find ourselves so far apart (...)

Young at heart, and it gets so hard to wait
When no one I know can seem to help me now
Old at heart, but I musn't hesitate
If I'm to find my own way out (...)

When I find out all the reasons
Maybe I'll find another way, find another day
With all the changing seasons of my life
Maybe I'll get it right next time
And now that you've been broken down
Got your head out of the clouds
You're back down on the ground
And you don't talk so loud,
And you don't walk so proud
Any more, and what for

Well, I jumped into the river too many times to make it home
I'm out here on my own, and drifting all alone
If it doesn't show, give it time
To read between the lines
'Cause I see the storm's getting closer
And the waves they get so high
Seems everything we've ever known's here
Why must it drift away and die

I'll never find anyone to replace you
Guess I'll have to make it throuugh
This time - all this time
Without you
I knew the storm was getting closer
And all my friends said I was high
But everything we've ever known's here
I never wanted it to die

It's not just how you describe the end of a relationship, it's actually more like the very definition of the end of a dream. When Stephanie Seymour broke up with Axl Rose (thus explaining why she isn't in the third part of the trilogy, ironically the one depicting the end of a romance), she didn't just put an end to their relationship, she tore down the dream world he had worked years at constructing for them, complete with fairy tale castles, an unbeatable group of friends who would stick together through the harshest battles, an army of followers and supporters, and them on top of their world, the king and queen of the wedding cake. They weren't just ''a couple'', they were the only couple the protagonist had envisioned in his perfect fantasy, a modern-day Disney/Camelot story.

Sometimes Axl knows exactly how to put his finger on something, and this is just one example.



And, yes, that really was Axl's house.

Chinese Democracy

Seriously, I saw Guns N' Roses live in '06, and they really are the best GN'R cover band in the world.

It's too bad they suck at writing their own songs and ran out of covers before they could release something as terrible as their version of Sympathy For The Devil again (or as decent as Spaghetti Incident again).

Chinese Democracy has to be the muddiest-sounding, most poorly written, anticipated rock record ever. 3 okay riffs on one record, one barely listenable song that is almost a 'cut/paste/recut/turn the pieces around' rendition of Estranged, but shorter and more like a cheap knock off.

And considering some of Buckethead's parts still made the record, it's also got to be the most disappointing release by a bunch of (mostly) very talented rockers ever (also Brain Mantia, Robin Fincke, Tommy Stinson).

I guess that's what $15M buys you: talent to play on your record, but not an ability to work well together - or songwriting talent.

Or maybe we're all wrong, and 50 years from now we'll realize how much Axl was ahead of his time and will be considered the Mozart of rock, you know, like supposedly the history books will be kind to W. Bush as the conservative Americans say.

There will always be those who dismiss them as another Bon Jovi-type hair metal band. But their sound was pretty far from that of Poison, Ratt, Mötley Crüe and the like... they had a rawness and a 'realer' rock sound that was closer to a mix of Zeppelin and Dead Boys, rather than a castrated and emasculated Aerosmith/Van Halen like the other bands that I would qualify as 'cock rock'.

Those who don't see the difference will say they didn't have any memorable songs apart from the hits, but it all depends what you want to listen to. As far as straightforward rock goes, Rocket Queen, My Michelle, Mr Brownstone, 14 Years and a few more are just as good as any Nirvana or Pixies or Stones song.

Also, I doubt anyone living outside the U.S. would really be that excited about that record, since only Americans are allowed their free Dr Pepper when the record gets released. But it's here, it's hyped, it cost a fortune - curiosity can bring a listen and that listen brings the inevitable conclusion that it wasn't worth the wait, for whoever actually was waiting.

It's been 14 years of silence
It's been 14 years of pain
It's been 14 years that have gone forever and I'll never have again

Who knew Izzy was such a visionary?