Jesus Christ, People

I posted this a minute ago on Facebook, and someone's already replied ''this is why kids shouldn't have kids''. Perhaps.

My friend Mark would probably say ''this is why stupid people shouldn't be allowed to have kids''. Touché.

Here's the story: 22-year-old Alexandra Tobias (hey, another name spoiled forever thanks to the internet!) shook her 3-month-old child to death - not once but twice - because it was... crying while she was playing Farmville.

Farmville.

The premise of the game is that by clicking on your screen, you pretend to be farming. You have crops to tend and attend to, trees to harvest, animals to... whatever the fuck you do with animals.

By clicking.

You're not actually farming, so, technically, taking a minute to care about your fucking kid before going back to the game is allowed. So is playing while holding the child. The possibilities are endless, and only limited by the power of your brain to think of a solution.

Unfortunately, killing your fucking kid is not typically seen as the best possible option, which is why she's facing 25 years in jail. Honestly, if I were a judge, there is no way I could put her in jail, considering she is just, clearly, too stupid to even exist - and yet, through improbable odds, she has survived 22 years so far; hopefully she's also too stupid to think of ''insanity'' as a defense, although personally, I'd give it to her right away without a trial. I'd also put her in an abandoned nuthouse set for demolition - and throw away the key. You know - an honest, administrative mistake.