Saint-Jean-Baptiste Playlist

Howdy!

As you may or may not know, June 24th is the Québécois National Holiday. Now, Québec's History is a tad complicated, born by treaties between the Aboriginals and French allowing for French settling, the French-Canadian forces helping the Americans first fight off the Brits to get their own country then assisting with some tribes in the "discovery" of the West, then modified by a losing battle against the British forces that resulted in the nullifying of the Settlers Pact, and subsequent attempt by the newly-formed English-Canadian political elite to assimilate and exterminate both French and Aboriginals on the Canadian territory, yet with all minority nations showing a sense of resiliency to remain alive - sometimes in name more than in fact - to this day.

Worth celebrating? I honestly don't know. Again, there are too many points to ponder and explain, with the word "nationalism" itself bearing a very different meaning in French (existence of a nation) than in English with the current undertones (superiority of or focus on one nation more than others), but I thought it'd be cool to concoct a hopefully-not-too-cheesy playlist for the 24 hours that will encompass June 24th.

Midnight - 1 AM:

ARCADE FIRE: Neighborhood #1 (Tunnels)
ROBERT CHARLEBOIS: Lindbergh
SERGE FIORI & RICHARD SÉGUIN: Deux Cent Nuits À L'Heure
ME MOM & MORGENTALER: Héloïse
HARMONIUM: Pour Un Instant
BRAN VAN 3000: Forest (French and English versions)
DANIEL BOUCHER: Chez Nous
COEUR DE PIRATE: Tu Oublieras Mon Nom
DEAD MESSENGER: Fat Black Heart
LES PARFAITS SALAUDS: 200 Jours
LEONARD COHEN: First We Take Manhattan
JEAN LELOUP: Balade À Toronto

1 AM - 2 AM:

ARCADE FIRE (with DAVID BOWIE): Reflektor
OCTOBRE: La Maudite Machine
VULGAIRES MACHINS: Compter Les Corps
TSPC: Connaître La Suite
DEAD MESSENGER: Toothcomb
GHETTONUNS: Invitation To Love
GROOVY AARDVARK: Dérangeant
HOT SPRINGS: Cellophane
PLUME LATRAVERSE: Bobépine
HOLE: Gold Dust Woman
GRIMSKUNK: Gros Tas d'Marde
B.A.R.F.: Wô Wô Tabarnak
ANONYMUS: Décrisse
PRIESTESS: I Am The Night, Colour Me Black

2 AM - 3 AM:

OFFENBACH: Deux Autres Bières
ROCK ET BELLES OREILLES: Bonjour La Police
VILAIN PINGOUIN: Délinquance
MEN WITHOUT HATS: Sideways
SCARLET BEAST: Our City
CANAILLES: Titanic
BRAN VAN 3000: Drinking In L.A.
FRENCH B: Je Me Souviens
LOCO LOCASS: Libérez-Nous Des Libéraux
RAY CONDO AND HIS HARDROCK GONERS: All Night Long
ROBERT CHARLEBOIS: Entre Deux Joints
OFFENBACH: Chu Un Rocker
LES FURYS: Aide-Moi
LA RÉVOLUTION FRANÇAISE: Québécois

3 AM - 4 AM:

RENÉE CLAUDE: Le Début D'Un Temps Nouveau
JACQUES MICHEL: Un Nouveau Jour Va Se Lever
ROBERT CHARLEBOIS: The Frog Song
LOCO LOCASS: Le But
GRIMSKUNK: Looking For Gabbio
ME MOM & MORGENTALER: Your Friend
ORKESTAR KRIMINAL: Der Schmayzer
ARCADE FIRE: Abraham's Daughter
SAMIAN & KASHTIN: Tshinanu
JEAN-PIERRE FERLAND: Un Peu Plus Haut
RICHARD DESJARDINS: Tu M'Aimes-Tu?

4 AM - 5 AM:

NUANCE: Vivre Dans La Nuit
DEAD MESSENGER: The Glass Hotel
GERRY BOULET: Un Beau Grand Bateau
DANIEL BÉLANGER: Respirer Dans L'Eau
PAUL PICHÉ: Mon Joe
VINCENT VALLIÈRES: On Va S'Aimer Encore
MITSOU: Lettre À Un Cowboy
LUC DE LA ROCHELIÈRE: Ma Génération
JEAN LELOUP: Je Suis Parti
LES COLOCS: Dehors Novembre
LEONARD COHEN: Closing Time

5 AM - 6 AM:

ALACLAIR ENSEMBLE: St-Roch
GEORGES DOR: La Manic
MARTIN STEVENS: Love Is In The Air
LOCO LOCASS: Le Mémoire De Loco Locass
LUC DE LA ROCHELIÈRE: Sauvez Mon Âme
LEONARD COHEN: Hallelujah
LEONARD COHEN: In My Secret Life
ALEX NEVSKY: J'Aurai Les Mains
COEUR DE PIRATE: Comme Des Enfants
MALAJUBE: Étienne D'Août
LES COLOCS: Pis Si Ô Moins
PHILÉMON (CIMON) CHANTE: Dors Poupée Dors

6 AM - 7 AM:

KEVIN PARENT: Fréquenter L'Oubli
GILLES VIGNEAULT: Mon Pays
RICHARD DESJARDINS: Les Yankees
LUC DE LA ROCHELIÈRE: Amère America
FÉLIX LECLERC: Le Petit Bonheur
PAUL PICHÉ: L'Escalier
COEUR DE PIRATE: Des Maisons
LUC DE LA ROCHELIÈRE: Si J'Te Disais Reviens
FRENCH B.: Quitter Son Pays
LES COWBOYS FRINGANTS: Mon Pays
LES COLOCS:  Tout Seul
KNLO: Justeçayinque

7 AM - 8 AM:

BAD NYLON: Jingle Dead
ME MOM & MORGENTALER: Everybody's Got AIDS
MELISSA AUF DER MAUR: Meet Me On The Dark Side
LOCO LOCASS: M'Accrocher?
GRIMSKUNK: Head Games
MOZART'S SISTER: Mozart's Sister
GROENLAND: The Things I've Done
MARTHA WAINWRIGHT: Four Black Sheep
ALEXANDRE POULIN: Couleurs Primaires
RICHARD SÉGUIN: Sous Les Cheminées
JEAN LELOUP: Zone Zéro
BEAU DOMMAGE: Le Blues De La Métropole
VANESSA LAVOIE: Down By The Bonfire

8 AM - 9 AM:

LEONARD COHEN: The Partisan/Le Partisan
THE HOT SPRINGS: The Fog And The Horn
DEJA VOODOO: Down In Mexico
PRIESTESS: Run Home
NO JOY: Califone
DOUGHBOYS: Shine
THE DEARS: Lost In The Plot
FRED FORTIN: Mélane
SAFIA NOLIN: Va-T'En Pas
JIM CORCORAN: J'Vais Changer Le Monde
WD-40: Je Reviens De L'Est
ARIANE MOFFATT: Je Rentre À Montréal

9 AM - 10 AM:

DANIEL BÉLANGER: Dans Un Spoutnik
LYDIA KÉPINSKY: Andromaque
ARIANE MOFFATT: Jeudi 17 Mai
HARMONIUM: Comme Un Fou
FRED FORTIN: Gratte
SALOMÉ LECLERC: Tourne Encore
STARS: What The Snowman Learned About Love
THE BARR BROTHERS: Half Crazy
WD-40: D'Aussi Loin
RAID: Capitaine Vodka
GODSPEED YOU! BLACK EMPEROR: Storm

10 AM - 11 AM:

LUC DE LA ROCHELIÈRE: Cash City
JEAN LELOUP: Le Dôme
LES COWBOYS FRINGANTS: Les Étoiles Filantes
TRICOT MACHINE: L'Ours
ROBERT CHARLEBOIS: Les Ailes d'Un Ange
GILLES VIGNEAULT: Les Gens De Mon Pays
PLUME LATRAVERSE: Les Pauvres
FRED FORTIN: Moisi Moé'ssi
RICHARD DESJARDINS: ... Et J'ai Couché Dans Mon Char
OFFENBACH: Seulement Qu'Une Aventure

11 AM - noon:

MARC DÉRY: Ostie Qu'y S'Lève Tard
ZÉBULON: R'viens Pas Trop Tard
JEAN LELOUP: Feuille Au Vent
LES COLOCS: Le Répondeur
MY EMPTY SCREEN: Deux Et Demi
MARTHA WAINWRIGHT: Leave Behind
RICHARD SÉGUIN: Journée D'Amérique
KANDLE: Not Up To Me
THE LINDBERGH LINE: Alissar
BRIE NIELSEN AND HER OTHER MEN: Be Alone
VILAIN PINGOUIN: Le Train
JEAN LELOUP: Printemps Été
MALAJUBE: Pâte Filo

Noon - 1 PM:

MARA TREMBLAY: Le Printemps Des Amants
GHETTONUNS: Blue Checks
LES ANTICIPATEURS: Sapoud
GHETTONUNS: Out On The Horse
LES DEUXLUXES: Springtime Devil
SÉBASTIAN HELL: Bitter End
KNLO: Mai (Ayayaye) (feat. Jam)
MANU MILITARI: Je Me Souviens 
SANS PRESSION: Vagabond Ma Religion
MUZION: La Vie Ti-Neg
YVON KREVÉ: Dans Nos Rues
KORIASS: Montréal-Nord
MANU MILITARI: La Traversée Du Lac Nasser
NOMADIC MASSIVE: Konba

1 PM - 2 PM:

LES ANTICIPATEURS: Findsemaine
MC LA SAUCE: Fuck You Estie
MANU MILITARI: Pour Chaque Goutte De Pétrole
BLACK TABOO: Police Plein De Pisse
SANS PRESSION & YVON KREVÉ: Pète La Coche
SANS PRESSION & AKHENATON: La Tendance Se Maintient
KORIASS: Nulle Part
ALACLAIR ENSEMBLE: Sauce Pois
BEAST: Out Of Control
VINCENT VALLIÈRES: Asbestos
JEAN LELOUP: Les Flamants Roses
PLUME LATRAVERSE: Les Humains
QUÉBEC REDNECK BLUEGRASS PROJECT: Tsé Quand Ça Va Ben 

2 PM - 3 PM:

LES COLOCS: Passe-Moé La Puck
BERNARD ADAMUS: La Question À 100 Piasses
WD-40: Ma Dépendance
FRED FORTIN: Tu M'Aimes-Tu?
LYDIA KÉPINSKY: Apprendre À Mentir
JASON BAJADA & JOANNE LABELLE: Tu Peux Dormir
WOLF PARADE: You Are A Runner And I Am My Father's Son
BEAST: Mr. Hurricane
PANOPTICON EYELIDS: Solar Mind
P/DO P/DRO: Jouïr
PONCTUATION: Obéïr À Ses Instincts Dans La Mesure Du Possible
MY DOG POPPER: We're Old, We're Fat And We're Slow

3 PM - 4 PM:

THE LINDBERGH LINE: Juggernaut
ARCADE FIRE: Ready To Start
OFFENBACK: Ayoye
MALAJUBE: Montréal -40
LES COLOCS: Le Pouding À L'Arsenic
BERNARD ADAMUS: En Voiture, Mais Pas D'Char
ZÉBULON: Job Steady
PLUME LATRAVERSE: La Pompe À Stime
WD-40: Gramme De Mort
LES MARMOTTES APLATIES: Détruire
BANLIEUE ROUGE: Sous Un Ciel Écarlate
BIONIC: Learn To Love The Goverment
LES HANDCLAPS: Pastiche

4 PM- 5 PM:

MITSOU: Mademoiselle Anne
JEAN LELOUP: 1990 (Original Rock Version)
MADAME: Propriétaire
THE BOX: L'Affaire Dumouthier
KANDLE: Control Me
ARIANE MOFFATT: Réverbère
DAVID USHER & MARIE-MAI: Je Repars
AVEC PAS D'CASQUE: En Attendant Que Ça Paie
DANIEL BÉLANGER: Rêver Mieux
SOUPIR: Les Larmes De Métal
NANETTE WORKMAN: Call Girl
THE BESNARD LAKES: Albatross

5PM - 6 PM:

LES SINNERS: Ne Reste Pas Sous La Pluie
LES CLASSELS: Si J'Étais Millionnaire
LES SULTANS: La Poupée Qui Fait Non
MITSOU: Le Ya-Ya
LES SKYLINERS: Wabash Blues
THE GRUESOMES: Don't Waste My Time
CÉSAR ET LES ROMAINS: Splish Splash Tout En Prenant Mon Bain
THE KINGPINS: Manon, Viens Danser Le Ska
LES DENIS DROLET: Dans Le Poulailler
RAFFY: Le Temps Des Vacances
PHILÉMON (CIMON) CHANTE: Vaincre L'Automne
LHASA DE SELA: Rising
MILK & BONE: New York
DUCHESS SAYS: Gainsbourg
JEAN LELOUP: Sang D'Encre

6 PM - 7 PM:

ROBERT CHARLEBOIS: Je Reviendrai À Montréal
LEONARD COHEN: Everybody Knows
LEONARD COHEN: I'm Your Man
LEONARD COHEN: Suzanne
LEONARD COHEN: So Long, Marianne
LEONARD COHEN: The Future
LEONARD COHEN: Waiting For The Miracle
LEONARD COHEN: Bird On A Wire
LEONARD COHEN: Dance Me To The End Of Love
ROBERT CHARLEBOIS: Ordinaire

7 PM - 8 PM:

ADAM & THE AMETHYSTS: Dreaming
LYDIA KÉPINSKY: Pie-IX
PONY UP!: Only Feelgood
THE STILLS: Still In Love
SALOMÉ LECLERC: Le Vent Nous Portera
JEAN LELOUP: Faire Des Enfants
LES HANDCLAPS: Cliché
WOLF PARADE: Dear Sons And Daughters Of Hungry Ghosts
RAID (W/ I-RONEE): Wise Up
DUCHESS SAYS: Negative Thoughts
THEE SILVER MT. ZION MEMORIAL ORCHESTRA: Fuck Off Get Free

8 PM - 9 PM:

RAID: Prendre Le Champs
THE KINGPINS: Watch Your Back
THE CARDBOARD CROWNS: Hats Off
THE BEATDOWN: The Other Side
SHALABI EFFECT: Mr. Titz (The Revelator)
NUTSAK: Innuendo Schminuendo
RIPCORDZ: Your Mother Wears Army Boots
CAPITAINE RÉVOLTE: J'Ai Oublié
ÉMILE BILODEAU: J'En Ai Plein Mon Cass
GROOVY AARDVARK & YVES LAMBERT: Boisson D'Avril
KERMESS: Y'A Pas Grand Chose Dans L'Ciel À Soir
B.A.R.F.: Le Petit Poisson

9 PM - 10 PM:

PLUME LATRAVERSE: Lisa Belle
JASON BAJADA: Loveshit
VULGAIRES MACHINS: Légaliser L'Héroïne
HOT SPRINGS: Headrush
VILAIN PINGOUIN: Salut, Salaud
MELISSA AUF DERMAUR: Out Of Our Minds
OFFENBACH: Câline De Blues
THE GRUESOMES: Hey!
THE AMERICAN DEVICES: You Wouldn't Understand
JEAN LELOUP: Voilà

10 PM - 11 PM:

ROBERT CHARLEBOIS: Indépendantriste
HARMONIUM: Un Musicien Parmi Tant D'Autres
ALACLAIR ENSEMBLE: Ça Que C'tait
JEAN LELOUP: Le Roi Se Meurt
CLAUDE DUBOIS: Si Dieu Existe
MES AÏEUX: Dégénération
LES COWBOYS FRINGANTS: En Berne
SÉBASTIAN HELL: J'Ai La Vie Qui M'Pique Les Yeux
ME MOM & MORGENTALER: Oh Well
ARCADE FIRE: Wake Up
SAMIAN & LOCO LOCASS: La Paix Des Braves
JEAN LELOUP: Paradis City
CÉLINE DION: L'Amour Existe Encore

11 PM - Midnight:

COEUR DE PIRATE: Adieu
ME MOM & MORGENTALER: Anarchie
SÉBASTIAN HELL: Selfish
DEAD MESSENGER: Master Plan
LES DEUXLUXES: My Baby & Me 
ALEX NEVSKY: On Leur A Fait Croire
HOLE: Celebrity Skin
LES TROIS ACCORDS: Dans Mon Corps
LOCO LOCASS: Sheila Ch'us Là
VULGAIRES MACHINS: Anéantir Le Dogme
JEAN LELOUP: Isabelle
ME MOM & MORGENTALER: Pepita La Pistolera
GHETTONUNS: Ten Years Down

Suggested films to watch: Elvis Gratton, Elvis Gratton 2, Elvis Gratton 3: Le Retour D'Elvis Wong, 15 Février 1839, Octobre, Le Déclin De L'Empire Américain, Jésus De Montréal, Les Invasions Barbares, Lost And Delirious, The Trostzky, Un Zoo La Nuit, Le Confessionnal, Le Polygraphe, Le Nèg, Eldorado.

Silent Extinction

Don't get me wrong, I signed the petition, but it's still fucked up that because people don't care enough to look into other people's situations in the Western World, they care more to act for animal rights than human rights:

In case it isn't clear, the email's subject line is "Silent Extinction".

Need we remind people that unarmed Black men are still getting shot daily by police in the U.S.?

That the sub-language and dialect of Paw-Paw (or "Missouri French") is in its last decade of existence in front of our very eyes?

Oh, speaking of French, that 6.5 million people in Québec are another generation away from losing a language they had kept alive for over 400 years because so-called Federalists' cuts in the education system have rendered those under the age of 25 unable to fucking spell and write their own fucking language?

On the daily, we are watching governments or government employees decide or participate in the silent genocide of people who have one thing in common: they are members of a community that is decidedly poorer than the ruling class of white Anglo-Saxons.

But let's save giraffes, or send whatever means of help to Congo, or start wars with Middle-Eastern countries, or threaten China with economic sanctions, or lift those with Russia. And let's keep having the media depict Cuba as a power-hungry dictatorship instead of a complete systemic overhaul that overthrew racism and corruption and is one detail away (an embargo from the world's largest exporter of goods) from thriving.

Yep, makes sense. White, Anglo-Saxon, imperialistic sense.

The New Colossus

The world is still a shitstorm of awful humans who have the means to fuck it up not just for the rest of us of the same race (the Human Race, by the way, the only not one decided by religion or skin colour or language), but for every other living organism on the planet.

On this side of the Pond, the Right and the Left argue about petty stuff and both sides use the weakest possible arguments to get their points across; the Left has the added bonus of never being able to forgive past mistakes regardless of context (Thomas Jefferson owned slaves when it was legal! Paul Reubens is a sex offender!) and any good from anyone who's done something bad previously is wiped off the table - which is one context where the Right's obsession with religion should come in handy: let he who has never committed a bad action cast the first stone, where no one over the age of 3 would be able to do so.

The Big Topic of the day is that of Refugees.

There needs to be a debate, and each country has to decide whether to take them in or not, and how many, and how. NOT ALL COUNTRIES NEED TO OPERATE THE SAME WAY. Honestly, we really need to start accepting other cultures' differences more, whether we agree with them or not, whether we think their practices are humane or not, whether they go against our values and/or common sense and/or our conception of rights or not.

This will be the subject of a much longer exposé eventually, one that encompasses a worldwide minimum wage, universal dual citizenship, a complete repeal of the death penalty, and the ability to exclude or deport citizens who do not conform to one place's chosen way of life. Not everyone wants the same life or lifestyle, and freedom includes letting others live their lives the way they want to.

But I digress.

Here is the text that lies at the bottom of the Statue Of Liberty:

The New Colossus

Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,
With conquering limbs astride from land to land;
Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand
A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame
Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name
Mother of Exiles. From her beacon-hand
Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command
The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.
“Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!” cries she
With silent lips. “Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door

Ideally, these are values I would like to strive for. But it's hard. Even Americans can't do it all the time. And I live in a country that I, myself, do not feel a part of, among people who refuse to stand up for themselves and declare their independence, their Humanity, and choose their own paths, despite all the old ones having failed.

I want to live in a place where people's differences are appreciated and encouraged. Where the only place religion has is as an equal to sports, meals or TV shows - as something you share with people close to you, people like you, that you can talk about in public but has no incidence on how the State operates. Three main rules: don't kill, don't steal, and don't fuck it up for everyone else. Where health and education are priorities and are NEVER cut in government spending. Where people don't get offended over the smallest fucking detail (or worse, WORDS!) because in this place, ALL PEOPLE ARE EQUAL, ALL THE TIME.

It's not about the past and all about the future, because this place hasn't existed yet.

Those who do not like it do not have to live there; they can go anywhere where their values are best reflected, because every place should have differences - we were not all meant to evolve at the same pace, nor should we force anyone to follow any rules they do not agree with when they can go to places where people think like they do, the same way we wouldn't like being forced to abide by shit that goes against the very fiber of our beings.

It's 2015, people. There are 8 billion of us. Either kill us all, or let's start tolerating our differences a little better, eh? And that includes intolerance as well, by the way. If, as a whole Russia seriously wants nothing to do with gay people, just make it clear to their President that jailing/killing suspected homosexuals before they become adults is wrong and punishable, and when those people turn 18 (or 21), help them to new lives in places where they'll be accepted better.

Intellectuals? Prague.
Speak French with a tendency to root for the underdog? Anywhere in Québec.
Big dreams? New York.

Same goes for people with all sorts of problems.

Which brings us back to refugees. And today's special, Syrians. Not every country can afford to take in huge masses of people - perhaps international aid would help, not just to pay for the refugees themselves, but also with a slight incentive, a bonus, to help the country itself and those already residing there who could use the pick-me-up (Greece, Spain, Québec) - that type of incentive would also invalidate any false sense of racism that refugees cost money, because they would actually bring in money.

We might also need to start planning long-term a little better: there are always a dozen wars raging, and there are always mass exoduses, and we need to start thinking about a permanent physical location where we can take care of their basic needs while they wait to be processed and sent to the best place for their needs, be it short or long term, depending on how badly they want to return home upon conflict resolution.

This is but mere reflection, possibly just the first step of a larger scale. But we do need to start thinking outside the box, because our old ways have always ended with the same old problems, and they have yet to adapt to this New World.

Happy St-Jean Baptiste Day!

It was going to be a paid Holiday like most others: spending three hours finishing the work I hadn't done last night, taking it slow, alone, in my shitty apartment, then heading out to see friends in a band performing, this time Orchestre Afrobeat Jeunesse Cosmique outdoors, at Parc Hibernia, in Pointe St-Charles.

But it rained, so all we got were the openers, Le Trio Poitras, for 75 minutes, then the rest of the festivities were cancelled.

But the Jeunesse Cosmique folks decided to turn the botched outdoors Québec National Holiday into a house party of sorts, and invited me over since I had friends in the band and was already there.

By the middle of the first song, i was the third percussionist, and by 10 PM we had recorded a live album. And I'm pretty proud of my playing on two tracks, particularly the last one.

And when I got home, I made myself the second-most Quebecest meal (because I wasn't going to make myself a maple syrup poutine this late at night), a bowl of spaghetti covered in Schwartz' smoked meat:

It was one of my best days in a very long time.

Video Of The Week: Aut'Chose

A lot of times, when I feature Montréal acts, or Québec acts for St-Jean Baptiste, I feature the best. Or at least my favourites. I provide my readership with the illusion that my peoples are talented, original, great.

I usually always feature English-language songs on this English-language blog.

Not today.

We're a cultivated, open, religion-free (mostly) democratic (presumably) people, sure, but we're also trashy beyond what Americans may know. There's White Trash residue in many of us, myself included.

For 400 years we have kind of refused to join the British Empire (and for 150, we're iffy about Canada as well, which belongs to the Queen anyway), and because of that, Americans falsely identify us with the French, from France.

Let me clear this up right now: we are nothing like them, apart from the smoking and over-the-top sex. They let us rot and abandoned us 400 years ago, so we did what every stepchild does and rebelled, and carved our own path. They're snobs who drink wine and eat snails, so we went with beer and fucking fried potatoes with gravy and cheese curds on top. They like buttoned down shirts, so we went with t-shirts. They covet everyone else's wife, so we... well, so do we.

Oh, they have books, we have movies. They have poets who become singer-songwriters, and apart from Leonard Cohen, we have dirty fucking rock songs that you either cannot decipher what the singer's talking about (Malajube), or speaks a street dialect (''joual'') that would make a Frenchie shit his pants if he encountered us in an alleyway (Offenbach).

Our top-earning star male musicians look like they stink, not because they don't shower like the croissant-eaters, but because they've just played a three-hour show, fucked three girls and maybe a guy, then played another show in another town (Jean Leloup), or are playing shows in-between week-long cocaine binges and use beer both as meal-replacements and perfume (Éric Lapointe).

We're a cross between New York City (all of Manhattan and Brooklyn) and Texas, minus the racism - for a while anyway. It's starting to seep in, but historically, it wasn't there. And it's still mostly based on language (the English-speaking crowd still owns half of buildings and commerces some 75 years after French speakers were allowed to start being masters of their own domains).

But we have dirt, is what I'm saying, and we're proud of it. I like having an edge, but I do get embarrassed at how low we can go. I mean, shit, sometimes I think Kid Rock might be one of my relatives.

And this is how low we go: Aut'Chose. Originally a band in the 1970s, fronted by ''poet'' Lucien Francoeur, they incorporated spoken-word into blues-rock, which in itself doesn't sound so bad. But they copied American bands' riffs without adding anything new, and the ''words'' were, uh, observational ''bar scene'' types of situations. Things that wouldn't be put to record nowadays because they can be said more eloquently by five-year-olds.

What's messed up is they went largely forgotten for most of the 1980s and 1990s, but for some reason there was a demand for a revival in the 2000s, and because a lot of the band wasn't available, was dead, or just didn't want to join in on the fun, only Francoeur and Jacques Racine remain as original members, and the rest of the musicians are an all-star line-up of the best Montréal indie (mostly francophone) scene: Vincent Peake (Groovy Aardvark, GrimSkunk, Floating Widget) on bass, Michel ''Away'' Langevin (drums) and Denis ''Piggy'' D'Amour (guitar) from Voïvod, Joe Evil (from GrimSkunk) on keyboards and guitar, and Alex Crow (Tricky Woo, Kosmos, Caféine) on guitar - the kind of line-up you could record anything from Beethoven pieces to technical metal to hard punk with.

But no, they re-did this ''classic'' instead, which I share because it makes as much/little sense in English as it does in French... They won't let me embed it, but please, click on this link and watch it. It features such ''stars'' as Rick Hughes (of 80s band Sword), Denis ''Snake'' Bélanger of Voïvod, Martin Deschamps, and two female guest stars, Francoeur's daughter and Racine's girlfriend. It's unclear which one Francoeur's hitting on in the video, by the way, as both kind of look alike to me - and no one finds that creepy in the least. Who the fuck knows what a Bar-B-Q Lady is, but I sure as fuck hope ''Bubblegum Baby'' isn't some euphemism for incest.

Saint-Jean-Baptiste

I mean, sure, I appreciate the effort, kind of. But, uh, maybe it lacks decorum and gravitas:

FYI: bridges are of federal capacity, meaning Canada, which owns Québec, manages these signs. Great Britain, which owns Canada, couldn't care less.

Kudos for the ''accent aigü'', thumbs down for calling the population a ''nagtioon''. Though, semi-funny. Like Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider asking if you ''like-uh the juice, eh, the juice is good, uhn?'' in classic episodes of Saturday Night Live.

Racism

For years (decades?), I rode on my high horse and claimed racism didn't exist here in the same way it does in anglo-saxon countries, perhaps because our latin and celtic genes didn't see ''the other'' as people to be conquered but more with curiosity...

I pointed towards how all the jazz greats called Montréal home during prohibition, depression, and through most of the civil rights movement of the 60s; towards the underground railroad that brought slaves here to be liberated, where they were greeted as humans in need of help, equality and integration; how the first 'coloured' people in villages were its stars (everybody flocked to them and wanted to find out more about them) rather than the misfits.

But maybe that's just because there were less people then - on both sides. And maybe there are too many people to keep a balance of acceptance now. Or maybe the abundance of social media just lets the dumb ones slip through more often, whether it means there are more racist people now or if they're just more vocal, or more exposed.

Point is: I don't know. Anything.

I hear the argument that ''Québec isn't as racist as elsewhere but still is a bit'' a lot more than I used to. Maybe that's true. Again: I don't know.

But it's good to revisit the subject once in a while, assess where it's at, and try to push for the best in everyone.

That being said, my friend Yan had two stories to tell on the matter.

Daniel Weinstock's Open Letter (To English-Canadians)

I don't know this Daniel Weinstock character, but his Open Letter To English-Canadians on Facebook is pretty much right on the money, for the most part:

An open letter to my English-Canadian friends. Please circulate in your networks as you see fit.
You may have heard that there has been some turmoil in Quebec in recent weeks. There have been demonstrations in the streets of Montreal every night for almost a month now, and a massive demonstration will be happening tomorrow, which I will be attending, along with my wife, Elizabeth Elbourne, and my eldest daughter Emma.

Reading the Anglo-Canadian press, it strikes me that you have been getting a very fragmented and biased picture of what is going on. Given the gulf that has already emerged between Quebec and the rest of Canada in the wake of the 2011 election, it is important that the issues under discussion here at least be represented clearly. You may decide at the end of the day that we are crazy, but at least you should reach that decision on the basis of the facts, rather than of the distortions that have been served up by the G&M and other outlets.

First, the matter of the tuition hikes, which touched off this mess. The rest of the country seems to have reached the conclusion that the students are spoiled, selfish brats, who would still be paying the lowest tuition fees even if the whole of the proposed increase went through.

The first thing to say is that this is an odd conception of selfishness. Students have been sticking with the strikes even knowing that they may suffer deleterious consequences, both financial and academic. They have been marching every night despite the threat of beatings, tear-gas, rubber bullets, and arrests. It is, of course, easier for the right-wing media to dismiss them if they can be portrayed as selfish kids to whom no -one has ever said "no". But there is clearly an issue of principle here.

OK, then. But maybe the principle is the wrong one. Free tuition may just be a pie-in-the sky idea that mature people give up on when they put away childish things. And besides, why should other people pay for the students' "free" tuition? There is no such thing as "free" education. Someone, somewhere, has to pay. And the students, the criticism continues, are simply refusing to pay their "fair share".

Why is that criticism simplistic? Because the students' claim has never been that they should not pay for education. The question is whether they should do so up front, before they have income, or later, as taxpayers in a progressive taxation scheme. Another question has to do with the degree to which Universities should be funded by everyone, or primarily by those who attend them. So the issue of how to fund Universities justly is complicated. We have to figure out at what point in people's lives they should be paying for their education, and we also have to figure out how much of the bill should be footed by those who do not attend, but who benefit from a University-educated work force of doctors, lawyers, etc. The students' answer to this question may not be the best, but then it does not strike me that the government's is all that thought out either.

And at least the students have been trying to make ARGUMENTS and to engage the government and the rest of society in debate, whereas the government's attitude, other than to invoke the in-this-context-meaningless "everyone pays their faire share" argument like a mantra, has been to say "Shut up, and obey".

What strikes the balance in the students' favour in the Quebec context is that the ideal of no up-front financial hurdles to University access is enshrined in some of the most foundational documents of Quebec's Quiet Revolution, in particular the Parent Commission Report, which wrested control of schools from the Church and created the modern Quebec education system, a cornerstone of the kind of society that many Quebeckers see themselves as aspiring to. Now, it could be that that ideal is no longer viable, or that we may no longer want to subscribe to it. But moving away from it, as Charest's measures have done, at least requires a debate, analogous to the debate that would have to be had if the Feds proposed to scrap the Canada Health Act. It is clearly not just an administrative measure. It is political through and through. Indeed it strikes at fundamental questions about the kind of society we want to live in. If this isn't the sort of thing that requires democratic debate, I don't know what is.

The government has met the very reasonable request that this issue, and broader issues of University governance, be at least addressed in some suitably open and democratic manner with silence, then derision, then injunctions, and now, with the most odious "law" that I have seen voted by the Quebec National Assembly in my adult memory. It places the right of all Quebec citizens to assemble, but also to talk and discuss about these issues, under severe limitations. It includes that most odious of categories: crimes of omission, as in, you can get fined for omitting to attempt to prevent someone from taking part in an act judged illegal by the law. In principle, the simple wearing of the by-now iconic red square can be subject to a fine. The government has also made the student leaders absurdly and ruinously responsible for any action that is ostensibly carried out under the banners of their organizations. The students groups can be fined $125000 whenever someone claiming to be "part" of the movement throws a rock through a window. And so on. It is truly a thing to behold.

The government is clearly aware that this "law" would not withstand a millisecond of Charter scrutiny. It actually expires in July 2013, well before challenges could actually wind their way through the Courts. The intention is thus clearly just to bring down the hammer on this particular movement by using methods that the government knows to be contrary to basic liberal-democratic rule-of-law principles. The cynicism is jaw-dropping. It is beneath contempt for the government to play fast and loose with our civil rights and liberties in order to deal with the results of its own abject failure to govern.

So that is why tomorrow I will be taking a walk in downtown Montreal with (hopefully!) hundreds of thousands of my fellow citizens. Again, you are all free to disagree, but at least don't let it be because of the completely distorted picture of what is going on here that you have been getting from media outlets, including some from which we might have expected more.

Daniel

It would be nice if he'd added the list of scandals Jean Charest and his Liberal Party has been associated with, but a good start deserves to be noticed.

Death Of A Democracy?

By now, chances are you've heard about last Summer/Fall's Occupy movement, and probably this Spring's two-month-strong student protests/strikes. If not, look it up, it's a fine read, students refusing a hike in education costs, defying (provincial) Prime Minister Jean Charest daily, kind of helping us forget how corrupt his government has been - but kind of not, at the same time.

Well, the Québec governing party, the Québec Liberal Party (which, technically, on a left-to-right, liberal-to-conservative scale ironically falls strongly on the Conservative side - picture Mitt Romney leading a Workers' Party) was holding its general council in Victoriaville, far from the rumbling streets of Montréal, comfortably, in the countryside, in a town usually so peaceful they don't even have a jail there...

Well, tons of anti-Charest protesters made the trip, including - but not limited to - busloads of students. Well, as may have been expected, shit did, indeed, hit the fan, and a riot ensued. My crystal ball is hazy from the all the smoke and pepper gas used in the picture gracing this post alone, but I can't wait to see how the media will spin this and how it'll affect public opinion. It can go either way: they may convince people that students are to blame for this and have to be forced back into class right away - or they could realize just how many folks are dissatisfied with this sham of a government.

The cops are close to being in over their heads, stopping and arresting at least 3 buses full of university students on their way back to Montréal - on the highway! - most of whom will likely be accused of ''participating in an illegal demonstration'', which they will eventually be found innocent of, but will spend the night in Victo and will have to go back to stand trial; minor yet irritating inconveniences, worse for foreign students and those depending on financial aid. But they will have to go back for sure, because a non-appearance in court is equivalent to pleading guilty in the eyes of the law.

Amnesty International has already condemned our police force of mishandling the situation - how worse will they look on the international scene? How will this affect tourism in our city this summer? Will we warn tourists to stay in their hotel rooms after 8PM?

One kid lost an eye early in the conflict from a noise grenade to the face, another one did so tonight from rubber bullets, another girl got shot in the face with rubber bullets and had her jaw broken and lost teeth, one kid is in the coma. Half a dozen cops and a dozen protesters are hospitalized, many more were injured but returned home or treated on-site (one paramedic says he treated at least 20 on-site).

This government has lost its legitimacy a long time ago, this is just added, useless bonuses. The student thing? Over a few million bucks, less than the Liberals have handed out to their mafia friends and fundraisers since the beginning of the year. How much more violence do we need before we kick those fuckers out of office? Do we need a cop or a kid to die? Chicago 68? Los Angeles 92?

History will not be kind to you, motherfucker, if you let this fester any longer.

How This Isn't Racism - A Short History Lesson

Jesus fucking Christ. Another case of mistaken-history/meaning gone awry.

Sure, historically, the American minstrel shows have pretty much tarnished 'blackface' forever by depicting African-Americans as lazy, stupid, ignorant and party-heavy, from the 1830s until the 1910s in public performances, pehaps until the 1950s in some informal, unprofessional gatherings (high schools, local Southern theaters).

But, first and foremost, actual minstrels were bards who just sang songs in medieval Europe. From the fifth century (year 400) on. Halfway between Shakespeare and buskers.

More importantly, though, Canada has never dealt with the U.S.-type of racism, segregation and, by the board, U.S.-type minstrel shows. Québec even less.

For roughly 300 years, French and English people invaded North America and had disputes over territories. Both white peoples. In 1763, France decided to let their North American colonies rot and fend for themselves, perhaps even die and by 1867 Canada was born, consisting of four provinces, including the pretty much exclusively French (and Aboriginals) Québec.

From the very beginning but even more so from 1867 onwards, Québec politics have involved the discussion of whether it should secede from Canada, largely for language and culture issues, but perhaps more importantly from being a dominion of the United Kingdom - an independence the United States declared in 1776 (which the U.K. accepted in 1883). To this day, Canada still isn't sovereign, as can be attested by Prime Minister Stephen Harper's recent decision to render the military back to its ''Royal'' affiliations and denominations.

For more than a century, Québec politicians - with decades-long help from the Catholic Church - have been more involved with trying to keep their culture alive than anything else, so any issue with ''foreigners'' has never been about a colour conflict but more about a language one; black people in Québec were never seen as a threat if they could speak French: they were allies. It is for that reason that Québec immigration, for years, targeted Haitians, Russians, Arabs, Western Europeans: they spoke a variant of French as a first or second language and could be integrated into the society almost immediately, making more of ''us'' against less of ''them''.

Over time, even anglophone Quebecers' views on progressive subjects such as Human Rights (here perceived more as Womens' and Gays' rights than separated by skin colour), war, social security and welfare, have come to closely resemble that of their francophone brethren/neighbours.

So when Anthony Morgan-types - 25-year olds who are more aware of U.S. culture than their place of residence's - take their Blackberries out to take a tribute to a great champion (in this case Usain Bolt, but it also happened last year for new hockey hero P.K. Subban, arguably the most-liked player on the Montréal Canadiens) and twist it to make it look like a whole school is guilty of mass racism, I can't help but elevate my voice in anger. And sadness.

Because where do you draw the line? Sporting the Jamaican sprint team's colours is ok, a wig would be alright, but no face paint? But you can paint your face in an Indian head and go see the Atlanta Braves (or Cleveland Indians, or Chicago Blackhawks, or Washington Redskins for that matter) because those are the team's colours? It's still face paint, usually involves the 'redding' of the skin, harks back to the quasi-extinction of an entire race of people by colonialists? Why is one considered ''cheering for'' but the other one is ''making fun of'', in this fucking day and age, more than 100 years after the fact, A FACT THAT DOESN'T EVEN GO ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE TRADITION OF SHOWS IT ''REPRESENTS'' in the collective minds of a few?

They were disguised as Bolt; when you wear a Jason or a Freddy mask for Halloween, you don't disrespect the character, people likely wouldn't recognize it if you didn't. Same goes for this JOYOUS fucking occasion of tribute and fun.

Anthony Morgan: learn your fucking history. Jesus was black, so was Cleopatra. And never were any races collectively abused in this province be it by the system, the laws, or major entertainment networks.

And Brandon Sun: you call yourself a newspaper? Shame on you for printing the story in a way that makes a whole school - the most respected of its kind in Canada - and, by affiliation, the 7 million people of the province of which these are the future elite, look like a KKK rally of retards. Then you wonder why we want out of your country. That belongs to another country's queen.

How The Back Pain Creeps Back Into My Life When I Least Expect It

Two years ago, out of nowhere, I came upon the worst stretch of back pain I'd ever had. It's back. Not as bad as back then - I can move, walk (with a cane), sleep. But the second-worst of my life, definitely.

It's at the bottom of my back completely, and it stops me from being able to get up when I'm seated or lying down, or even walk properly. And when the pain hits, it's sudden, and strong enough to will me directly to my knees - which I no longer do, because it's even more of a pain to get up from.

It's the reason why I haven't been posting for the last few days - my back can't handle my fucking chair. It wasn't just that I was content with finally averaging more than a post per day in a given month for the first time, I promise.

It's cost me a trip to Québec City with the Lindbergh Line, and has made my tolerance towards bankers dissipate. I think I'll eat red meat tonight, it'll give me the impression that I killed something, which might quench my desire to do just that.

There's A Douche Part Two: Spector Returns

Less than three months after my rant about Sportsnet's Mark Spector being an ignorant racist douche, as if to prove my point and revive the flames of my anger, the currently-most-read CFL blogger and part-time sports journalist was at it again - this time not just dissing Quebecers, but adding a totally crazy comment I'm not even sure attacks just one race, which goes:

(In the CFL), there are entire receiving corps of white guys, for Pete’s sake. One of them — Saskatchewan’s — is maybe the best in the league!

Like, how imbalanced is the chemistry in his brain to even think about thinking that way? Who gives a shit what skin colour athletes are in the context of league play? A league that barely has eight teams and ran for years with two teams sporting the exact same name spelled differently?

But the man was into the subject of race - and perhaps the sole reason he even brought it up was to segue into his need to reiterate that one of the country's two founding peoples were too demanding for inferior folks:

Yet, faced with questions from the Francophone media over Alouettes complaints regarding their hotel and dressing room, Cohon switched into commissioner mode again.

He may have wanted to say, "Is anything ever good enough for you whiny Quebecers?" or, "My Gosh, do you divas EVER stop expecting preferential treatment?"

First, let's get this straight: the ''Francophone'' media asked a question regarding Alouettes' players complaints, who play in Edmonton  - where the Grey Cup game is being held this weekend - all year long and felt that this time, with the league taking care of accommodations, they are less comfortable this week in preparation for the season's most important game - the Final - than when they're in town for a regular-season game. That, perhaps, while they are in a hostile city (the crowd will, for sure, encourage the Western team), the other team is being treated with the respect Champions deserve. Oh, and the Als are the defending Champs.

Second, most Alouettes aren't Quebecers, they're American. And people of colour. Essentially, ''non-whites'' are asking for 'preferential treatment''... kinda feels like the 2008 U.S Presidential elections, when people were calling Barack Obama ''uppity''.

Jesus Christ, Spector. Look at a calendar. November. 27. 2010. Twenty-fucking-ten. They don't make people like you anymore, haven't in years; what fucked-up manufacturing plant are you from?

Mind you, I'm all for freedom of speech, I'm not asking for the douchebag to get fired. But since my freedom of speech also exists, I'm allowed to call him out on his bigotry. And, like most bigots, he justifies his reasoning with a vague (and false) sense of truth, right before going on on both tirades:

Just because it’s true, it doesn’t mean the commissioner can say it. And just because he can say it, it doesn’t mean it’s true.

In other words: the commissioner can't say these things in this PC-friendly era, so I have to. Because it's true.

Here's the truth, Spector: you are sick in the head. Every excuse, to you, is good enough to bash people for their race - especially Quebecers. Even when those who commit ''the actions'' aren't actually Quebecers, just representing a city full of them.

Quebecers Are Like Carey Price

Quebecers are like Carey Price: damned if they do, even more damned when they don't. Or maybe it's the other way around, but there's damnation with every action, that I am positive about.

Much has been said about Exhibitiongate (or Exhibit 1, as I like to call it myself), but I'll post it here anyway: in a pre-season game that meant absolutely nothing in which both teams fielded, basically, half a roster with pros and the other half with rookies or guys who'll never ''make it'', The Anointed One let in 4 goals on a mere 9 shots before being replaced midway in the game, when a #1 goalie in the NHL should stop 91% of shots faced. 23 minutes in, and Price was already getting booed - both a result of his own poor play, but also, probably, as fans had a reason to show the team's management that they disagreed with playoff hero Jaroslav Halak being traded away to make room for Price.

Defenseman Josh Gorges had this to say after the game:

Booing the goaltender in the first preseason game, that's unfair. The fans were cheering but it was derisive. Honestly, I don't understand. It's tough for the whole team. Carey is just one player on the team. Everyone is at fault for the goals that went in. I know expectations are raised, but is he Superman? Is he supposed to save everything?

The next game, Price... let in 6 goals on 31 shots in a 6-2 loss, in Ottawa. Good thing it was on the road, because I suspect fans might have done more than boo - maybe throw shit on the ice, maybe commit murder. All in all, Jesus Price had let in 10 goals on 40 shots in less than two games, for an 0-2 record, a goals-against average of 6.67, and a save percentage of .750.

But the booing got the most attention, obviously, considering it was a meaningless game. Many called the boo-birds ''idiots'', some called them ''fairweather fans'', and other names were called. But, once again, a prominent member of the media - this time a CBC reporter - blamed ''separatists''. What he meant was ''fucking Frenchmen'', of course, the implication being that Price was only booed because he's an English-speaking aboriginal man from B.C. and that a French-speaking Québec-born goalie would not have received the same treatment.

I touch on this subject quite a lot - only because it's becoming more and more rampant in the media; I mentioned it here just two weeks ago. Funny how I don't recall anyone booing European Cristobal Huet, or even Ontarian Jeff Hackett when they were the top dogs here. But we did boo the last goalie to win hardware in this town in José Theodore. And we jeered the best goalie of all time - Patrick Roy, of course - so badly that he never played another game in a Habs uniform and instead went to Colorado to win 2 more Stanley Cups and another Conn Smythe trophy.

We weren't all ''federalists'' then, asshole. We're not all ''separatists'' now, either. What sucks is this douchebag from the only national broadcasting company - the one objective news source we have that spans the whole country coast-to-coast-to-coast - is actually from this province. What this means is he's been nurturing these fucking ''thoughts'' (if you can call them that) for his whole life, and only now laid them on paper.

Sure, he apologized, politely and from the tip of the lips - but the accusation came so fast that you can't help but come to the conclusion that these are his innermost thoughts, and that he's only apologizing for reasons of Public Relations - because you're not allowed to insult the inferior race, it's not politically correct.

Well, dude, here's a brain-twister: seems to me these feelings are ingrained in you because they were taught to you - probably by your parents - and you've lived through, first, the scare of 76-80 and then of the 1995 referendum without actually understanding the issues that were at stake. In your apology, you state you're a ''proud Quebecer, and a proud Canadian''; if so, then, how do you justify one of the two founding provinces of the country not having signed the Constitution? How can you be proud of a country that doesn't want to include you in it, nor in its decisional process - but takes your tax money without flinching? A country that hates every time you request something but doesn't allow you to leave?

The reason there were sovereignists in the first place was to no longer be under the authority of the Queen of England, a separation the Americans did two hundred years ago. Sure, it also involved protecting the French-language-based culture that had successfully resisted assimilation in the past 375 years, but once you've been hanging onto your identity for so long, you kind of do deserve a treat of some kind.

In doing so, seceding would have, essentially, made Quebecers the masters of their domain, so to speak. They would only have to answer to themselves, make their own laws according to their own beliefs, and pay taxes to only one State, effectively reducing the triple-overlap of government levels currently in place. What it meant is this (and this is even more true now in the multi-cultural Québec we have now that leaves no other choice but this one): IF YOU CONSIDERED YOURSELF A QUEBECER, IT WOULD HAVE BEEN YOUR FUCKING COUNTRY, TOO.

Full disclosure: at times, I have been for seceding, and at others, against. Currently, while I view the action per se as a - if not the - only way to preserve what is internationally known as Canadian Values (free quality health care, affordable education, poutine as the national meal, a charter of human rights where all are equal regardless of race, sex, creed, religion or sexual orientation), I DO NOT TRUST those who would be in power when that happens (Pauline Marois, Jean Charest, Mario Dumont, most members of the PQ who are over the age of 50) to not enslave us all to the highest bidder. Those I do trust - the smart, inclusive, open-minded, Obama-like charismatic - are always, inevitably, in parties too small to have an impact, or thrown away from their own for reasons of someone else's ego - that's Gilles Duceppe (the smartest and most trusted federal party leader in the Canada), Amir Khadir, André Boisclair, Richard Bergeron, Elsie Lefebvre - people with a vision for a better, safe, more communal society that includes everyone in it. Even you. Especially you.

But you'll never understand because you'd rather blindly hate. At least Carey Price can change public perception by winning us over - winning a Vezina, a Stanley Cup, outplaying Halak for a couple of seasons, overshadowing Roy's exploits. Some would say none of this is likely, at this point, but none of it is impossible, either.

There's A Douche, Douche, Douche Hangin' 'Round The Back Door: Mark Spector Views Quebecers As Morally Corrupt

One thing that surprises me when a (or in this case many) racist comments towards Quebecers are published in an English Canada magazine or website is the lack of subtlety. Not only are the ''Frenchies'' the only people it's alright to be bashing, it's more often than not done in a way that it implies fact, like ''these sub-humans are terrible people, what, you didn't know? Here's yet another example why''; if you'd talk like that of Mexicans, Blacks, Jews - all hell would likely break loose. But the ''fucking frogs''? That's a-ok.

Case in point: this morning's Sportsnet column by Mark Spector. So he's against government funding for a proposed new arena in Québec City that could, perhaps, eventually, be used to lure in an NHL team, but would first and foremost be used in an Olympic bid and as a live concert venue.

His (actual, decent) arguments:

So what if arenas in Ottawa, Toronto, Montreal, Winnipeg and Vancouver were all privately built, with no handouts from the Feds? Who cares if in Edmonton, where two years of local haggling has included every scheme except looking to Ottawa or provincial coffers for the lion’s share of the costs?

Ok. Except Winnipeg got some of the feds' money for their arena's renovations. And Calgary's arena, conveniently is left out. Why? Because its actual name is the 'Olympic Saddledome', as it was built to host the 1988 Winter Games. Just like the feds spent over $5-billion in Vancouver infrastructures for their 2010 Games. Which is exactly what Québec wants for 2022 - Olympics.

And what about all the other pro sports stadiums paid for by the government? Montréal's Olympic Stadium? BC Place's roof? The proposed new Hamilton Stadium - or the Hamilton Copps Coliseum, formerly the Civic Center.

Where Spector, who shares a last name with alleged killer Phil Spector, goes a tad awry is when he tries to hypnotize us with fake math:

If the Mayor of Quebec figures that tacit level of commitment is solid enough to wager all those taxpayer’s dollars, than who are we to argue? Other than, of course, the Rest of Canada, whose hard-earned money, through copious transfer payments to the needy La Belle Province would make up both the provincial and federal input.

But we’ll ask you: If no one in Quebec cares where the money comes from, why should we? They’re getting the tax dollars from the Rest of Canada anyhow — who are we to say what they should spend it on?

Ok, Champ. Here's how it really works: Québec and Ontario, at this point, make up for between 45-50% of the country's population, with Ontario being the richest province. Chances are we're also the two provinces giving up the most in federal income taxes, no? Yes. Québec provides 20-25% of federal income taxes.

But that's not it: Québec is, in fact, a distinct society. It spends more and saves less. And guess what that means? In federal GST sales taxes, we're #1, with a whopping 30% of the country's GST revenues coming from this province. Sure, some Ontarians account for it when they cross the border after 1AM to drink here, but mainly, we like to spend our cash. And when we do, we fill up the coffins in Ottawa.

So... one of the provinces who ends up paying for the others the most is... needy? Makes no sense. Unless...

Ah yes. The bigotry:

It is too easy though, for an Albertan to paint the picture of a province that seems always to have it's [sic] hand out; a people who look at the way things are done across the rest of Canada and appear to say to themselves, “Why should we have to pay also?”  (...)

Of course, that is the mantra of a province that has become the Florida of Canada.

In the United States, a disproportionate amount of mail scammers, telephone fraudsters, real estate schemes and all-around con artists reside in Florida. In Canada, whenever there is a Shawinigate, a sponsorship scandal, accusations of a crooked judge-naming process, or a good old-fashioned political sex scandal a la Julie Couillard, it seems it is brought to us by our Quebecois friends.

Ok, wow. First off, let's decipher the apples from the nectarines, and the oranges from the ice cream: Canada's leader in mail/phone scams is Montréal, whose team built its arena with its own cash, not QC. And Montréal's pretty much the reason why Québec is still a province and not its own country, so be nice.

Shawinigate: when former Prime Minister Jean Chrétien helped a hotel/motel/auberge get federal funds for its renovations... which seems less bad than all the Western MPs in current PM Stephen Harper's cabinet, who have each had billions invested in their own 'hoods in Saskachewan and Alberta for brand-spanking new projects. That's today. And the past 5 years. And some of them are couples, and they own businesses together that pay no taxes anywhere. Helena Guergis, anyone?

Sponsorship scandal: at the time (the '95 referendum of Québec sovereignty), most of the ROC was pleading with the feds to massively invest in the ''No'' campaign to stop the province from seceding. And the feds did just that. Had they not, we wouldn't even be having this conversation.

The judge-naming controversy is provincial, sure, but it's also on-going, which means it hasn't concluded yet. But the way all of Canadian politics seem to work, I wouldn't be surprised if here was but the first of 10 or 13 province/territory investigations. Party fund-raisers have way too much power over who gets appointed where - and Harper's feds are yet again a prime example, with dozens of partial senators named by Harper's money-man - who included himself, and former illiterate NHL coach Jacques Demers.

And calling the Couillard thing a sex scandal? Really? She's a hot chick who likes to fuck men who have power. She dated an MP, he was stupid enough to leave confidential documents at her home. I fail to see how this is a Lewinsky-gate or a pedophilia ring or how it compromised national security, seeing as the only thing Bernier did as an MP was bring Twinkies to the troops in the Middle East.

Myself, usually, when I see inequalities in the Québec/Canada divide, I see Omar Khadr, a Canadian citizen, not being brought back from whence he is tortured by U.S. military.

Double Standards In Our Home And Native Land

Toronto Argonauts offensive tackle - and offensive douchebag - Rob Murphy was fined by the CFL for comments he made on Twitter during the team's train ride to Montréal, such as :

"At train station ... Pumped to be smelling foreigners this early in the A.M. They smell less offensive this way....little known fact,"

and

"Ok...the novelty of riding on a train thru Ontario and "Frenchland" has worn out....get me off this damn thing!!!!"

Now... read the ''comments'' section of the link I posted...

So far, all are up in flames about his comments on ''foreigners'', none about ''Frenchland''. Like it's ok to hate on ''The French'', despite us being the country's fucking founders and it being one of the two official languages.

Oh, and we're getting pretty fucking tired of being called ''The French'', too, seeing as we're pretty much nothing like people from France, in the same way North American speakers of English are nothing like the Brits and aren't called ''The English''. The last time I went to Calgary or Detroit for tea is probably the more recent than the last time I wore a beret and striped shirt to mime all day, dine on frog legs and steal your girlfriend. Well, maybe not that last part, but it's hard to shake off everything that's in your DNA.

How I Used To Entertain Myself As A Child

(reposted from my collectibles blog at http://hellsvaluablecollectibles.blogspot.com/2010/03/peter-zezel-autographed-card.html)

I was always a fan of Peter Zezel. Well, not always, I didn't find out he even existed until the 1986-87 O-Pee-Chee set, but from the moment I saw his card, his name, his position, and his stats - I was fan. More so when I actually saw him play. I liked him so much that I'm willing to pretend he never played for the Toronto Maple Leafs.

What I used to do with hockey cards, in my parents' living room, in our apartment on the second floor of a duplex on Melrose between Terrebonne and Somerled, was take all my hockey cards, and hold drafts, separating all of my cards (from different years) and making new teams up, since most sets I had didn't have complete teams (say, all the Habs or all the Rangers).

I'd have favourites, of course, but I always tried to play it fair, letting the flow of the game - and the eccentricities of our carpeting - do their thing. ''My'' team, Les Nordiques de NDG, was always the one with Patrick Roy in nets, and was usually the only one who got the games where officiating was, shall we say, uneven. In the best of worlds, that Roy team would also have Al MacInnis on defense, but not always. But almost inevitably, it had Zezel at centre.

Each team would be comprised of 7 players (a goalie, three forwards, two defensemen, and a backup player in case of injury), and the puck was one that I took from my table hockey set. I kept full statistics of every game, that I wrote on endless sheets of loose leaf paper, then compile all the stats on other sheets, and actually hold 80-game seasons with full schedules that I'd pre-set by hand. And not just the easy stats like goals and assists, but also penalty minutes, powerplay goals (and assists), shorthanded goals (and assists), plus/minuses, empty-net goals, game-tying goals, game-winning goals, the first goal of a game, shots on goal, faceoffs taken and won, hat tricks... I was NHL 09 twenty years ahead of my time.

And many times, at season's end, he would be in the league top-5 for scoring, close to Wayne Gretzky, Peter Stastny, Mats Naslund, Brent Sutter and Brett Hull. He was even named League MVP a couple of times - yes, I even gave out all the awards, even the Rocket Richard trophy, 15 years before it even existed, known in my league as the Guy Lafleur trophy. Needless to say: Zezel was one of the very best players of the league that played out in my mind.

In real life, though he was a very good player, he was never quite as spectacular: four seasons with more than 20 goals, including one with 33, two seasons with 72 points (one with the Philadelphia Flyers and one with the St. Louis Blues), always among the league leaders in faceoffs won and reliable in his own end. All that, and a tendency to have as many penalty minutes as points. And two Stanley Cup finals as a Flyer, both lost to Gretzky's Oilers.

What I didn't know about Zezel (a Serbian name, originally, although he is a ''good Canadian boy'' from Toronto) was that he had hemolytic anemia, a rare blood disorder. It had messed with his health in 2001, and eventually claimed his life (after a spleen-removal surgery and subsequent brain hemorrhage) on May 26, 2009.

A few months ago, I saw a post on Sal's Autograph Blog, where he had purchased a Zezel-autographed card on Ebay, and mentions his small part in the Rob Lowe/Patrick Swayze film Youngblood (he even made fake hockey cards for his character in the movie, which you can find here). From then on, I was also on the lookout for a decently-priced Zezel card on Ebay.

I hoped it would be as the Flyers' #25, but I found this one instead: a 1990-91 Upper Deck (card #17). He appears as a Blues (even though the Blues sent him to the Washington Capitals in exchange for Geoff Courtnall in the off-season), but unlike Sal's card, which he signed in blue sharpie over a blue Blues jersey, mine was signed in black, which contrasts enough with his white uniform that the autograph seems clearer (and it looks sharp and great!), and the picture as well. And as Upper Deck was known to try to do at the time, the back picture features Zezel in the team's dark, away jersey. The best of both worlds.